EVERYONE WILL DISAPPOINT YOU
But Cutting Them Off Might Not Be The Answer
I’ve had my feelings hurt a bunch these last few weeks by different people in my life. I won’t get into the sordid details because I believe it’s important to respect people’s privacy (bummer, I know). But this continued blow after blow has forced me to confront my growing urge to cut my ties to society and move to a very clean cave with my husband and two dogs. While I intellectually understand that community and connection are vital for our well-being, so much so that it is the main basis of my work as a relationship coach and mental health advocate, I can’t ignore this urge I have to cut everyone loose while shouting, “I DON’T NEED YOU ANYWAY!”
It makes sense that my instinct right now is to withdraw. I am grieving the loss of my incredible mother and may or may not be in a depressive episode. I am off birth control for the first time in 20 years and battling a range of hormones. And my country is being ripped apart by a hateful man who (somehow!) won the popular vote. All of this makes me even more fragile in the face of small slights and larger betrayals. It feels difficult to “buy-in” to the human race at the moment. So my brain, in a desperate attempt to protect me, thinks the most obvious solution to prevent future pain is to disconnect. To take my metaphorical ball and go home forever.