it is so great that you and John have found each other, just like your parents found each other. I wish you and your family all the best in these horrible times.
I happen to know the man you married and remember one day when he was in 4th grade, he had empathy for a boy that was handicapped ,bound to a wheel chair in his Homeroom class. He asked me one day to take him over to this boys home so he could "cheer him" up and play video games with him while all his other "cool friends" were all outside playing. I will never forget how happy he made that little boy on that day "Feel Special" and now he had a friend to play with that day. We would go over many times after school to visit him and he and John would play his favorite video games . The happiness John gave to this handicapped child was bountiful !
His name happened to be Ken too ! :))
I am so happy that you and John are both family oriented as John like you grew up surrounded by a loving family, always filled with tons of love, compassion and self giving. Your story makes me very happy to read about John's unselfishness & Love and yet not surprised. We are very proud of John & the man he became and now to continue his journey with his new lovely wife. Your test for a strong marriage has started on a very strong path. It shows daily for all those little things that add up to Love that you give now to your family and to each other. May God Bless your entire family during these hard times . God has given you so many fond memories to cherish with your family and this now is a time of test. Humor and food is very important too :))
So happy to hear John is using all his talents during hard times. Hugs to All !!!! XOXOXOXOXO
This is so, so awesome to read. Coming out of a broken engagement and heartbroken, I’ve felt like, “God, why even BOTHER.” But this. This is what I want. It’s so heartening to hear; thank you.
Thank you Allison, this was lovely and I'm so happy you now have John.
There's this thing my mom always tells me whenever I'm anxious which is (in a Filipino dialect) "Ipahimutang ra tanan". This roughly translates to "everything in its place" or "everything will work itself out the way it was meant to" and that's always brought me so much comfort. So Allison, ipahimutang ra tanan!
This is beautiful. You deserve all this love and care Allison. It’s also so reassuring and validating to read this and know that I did not marry the right person (I’m happily divorced now!) and raised the bar even more to the level of love, support, and devotion that you are naming and know that we all deserve. You’ll get through this, sending so much love ❤️
Love this testimony of true love. What it really means and how it is expressed in the things that we do -- like picking out the bacon bits out of a bowl of soup! ❤️
feeling and expressing “I married the right person" and having the person you married feel and express that as well is, well, that's the stuff.
i'm so glad he's there for you and your family in this now and in all other kinds of nows.
thank you for sharing.
much love,
myq
PS When you say, "He is... making my mother laugh when no one else really can at this point," just wanted to double check if you've shared my standup comedy with her. It's not urgent, but I just wanted to make sure you've tried EVERYTHING. Love you!
There are so many things I want to say but cannot articulate - Allison, from the bottom of my heart and on the behalf of the whole ESL community - I am so so happy that John is the man you deserve, the one who cares for you so much, who can hold your hand through tough times. 🩷
I’m so sorry that your mom is facing a hard end, but it sounds like you all are surrounding her with the love and support I am sure she needs.
I feel like I married the right person. My husband and I have been through a hell of a few years. Illness, loss, and hard times - we have tested our vows thoroughly. We can both be crabby patties, but we’re vulnerable enough to own it and fun enough to call being irritable something cute. He is my family. I cried my first Christmas away from my parents partially because I missed them, but mostly because I was making my own family. Wow. Big, powerful stuff.
I, like you, feel like my own parents very strong marriage influenced my idea of marriage and partnership. It’s interesting to think about what my husband Mike brings into our relationship, because it’s very different but it has made us very compatible. I wonder what your John’s experience was and what made the magic of your marriage possible? I don’t think that’s a real question cause that’s awfully probing and personal. But I do find partnerships that work so fascinating and miraculous.
From someone who loves the idea of marriage but it’s not sure if it’s made for such commitment, I’ll definitely read your book ❤️ Beautiful story and I pray that your family keep finding strength and hope to deal with such times.
not me crying over this text… 😭
it is so great that you and John have found each other, just like your parents found each other. I wish you and your family all the best in these horrible times.
This brought me to tears. Thanks for continually sharing your journey. Deep peace to you, Ruth, Ken, John, Sugar and Phantom!
I happen to know the man you married and remember one day when he was in 4th grade, he had empathy for a boy that was handicapped ,bound to a wheel chair in his Homeroom class. He asked me one day to take him over to this boys home so he could "cheer him" up and play video games with him while all his other "cool friends" were all outside playing. I will never forget how happy he made that little boy on that day "Feel Special" and now he had a friend to play with that day. We would go over many times after school to visit him and he and John would play his favorite video games . The happiness John gave to this handicapped child was bountiful !
His name happened to be Ken too ! :))
I am so happy that you and John are both family oriented as John like you grew up surrounded by a loving family, always filled with tons of love, compassion and self giving. Your story makes me very happy to read about John's unselfishness & Love and yet not surprised. We are very proud of John & the man he became and now to continue his journey with his new lovely wife. Your test for a strong marriage has started on a very strong path. It shows daily for all those little things that add up to Love that you give now to your family and to each other. May God Bless your entire family during these hard times . God has given you so many fond memories to cherish with your family and this now is a time of test. Humor and food is very important too :))
So happy to hear John is using all his talents during hard times. Hugs to All !!!! XOXOXOXOXO
This is so, so awesome to read. Coming out of a broken engagement and heartbroken, I’ve felt like, “God, why even BOTHER.” But this. This is what I want. It’s so heartening to hear; thank you.
Also, when you don’t have a good model for successful partnerships, it can feel a bit harrowing. But I still have hope.
Thank you for sharing all of this journey with us. Reading your writing as of late has kept bringing me back to this Mary Oliver poem:
The Uses of Sorrow
(In my sleep I dreamed this poem)
Someone I loved once gave me
a box full of darkness.
It took me years to understand
that this, too, was a gift.
<3
Thank you Allison, this was lovely and I'm so happy you now have John.
There's this thing my mom always tells me whenever I'm anxious which is (in a Filipino dialect) "Ipahimutang ra tanan". This roughly translates to "everything in its place" or "everything will work itself out the way it was meant to" and that's always brought me so much comfort. So Allison, ipahimutang ra tanan!
I love your love ❤️
I was going to say this too ❤️
This is beautiful. You deserve all this love and care Allison. It’s also so reassuring and validating to read this and know that I did not marry the right person (I’m happily divorced now!) and raised the bar even more to the level of love, support, and devotion that you are naming and know that we all deserve. You’ll get through this, sending so much love ❤️
Love this testimony of true love. What it really means and how it is expressed in the things that we do -- like picking out the bacon bits out of a bowl of soup! ❤️
This makes me so sad for you and so happy for you at the same time. Sending lots of love.
dear allison,
this is beautiful. thank you so much for sharing.
feeling and expressing “I married the right person" and having the person you married feel and express that as well is, well, that's the stuff.
i'm so glad he's there for you and your family in this now and in all other kinds of nows.
thank you for sharing.
much love,
myq
PS When you say, "He is... making my mother laugh when no one else really can at this point," just wanted to double check if you've shared my standup comedy with her. It's not urgent, but I just wanted to make sure you've tried EVERYTHING. Love you!
There are so many things I want to say but cannot articulate - Allison, from the bottom of my heart and on the behalf of the whole ESL community - I am so so happy that John is the man you deserve, the one who cares for you so much, who can hold your hand through tough times. 🩷
I’m so sorry that your mom is facing a hard end, but it sounds like you all are surrounding her with the love and support I am sure she needs.
I feel like I married the right person. My husband and I have been through a hell of a few years. Illness, loss, and hard times - we have tested our vows thoroughly. We can both be crabby patties, but we’re vulnerable enough to own it and fun enough to call being irritable something cute. He is my family. I cried my first Christmas away from my parents partially because I missed them, but mostly because I was making my own family. Wow. Big, powerful stuff.
I, like you, feel like my own parents very strong marriage influenced my idea of marriage and partnership. It’s interesting to think about what my husband Mike brings into our relationship, because it’s very different but it has made us very compatible. I wonder what your John’s experience was and what made the magic of your marriage possible? I don’t think that’s a real question cause that’s awfully probing and personal. But I do find partnerships that work so fascinating and miraculous.
Preordered on kindle!
From someone who loves the idea of marriage but it’s not sure if it’s made for such commitment, I’ll definitely read your book ❤️ Beautiful story and I pray that your family keep finding strength and hope to deal with such times.
This is so heartwarming to read❤️