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Phoebe's avatar

I have had to unlearn classism and intellectualism! When Brexit happened in the UK, it was very easy - and also pushed by certain aspects of the media - that it was a certain type of community(working class primarily) that voted for Brexit, and it was because they "didn't understand" the impacts. I now know that it is a lot more complicated than that, that working class communities are not a monolith, and that valuing cleverness is ableist.

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Jessica G's avatar

Great read - I'm also a recovering cool/pick me girl :/

I'm in my early 30's and it's interesting to think about how a lot of women our age built aspects of our personality (or identities?) around pretty messed up sexist ideas like this.

In my case, I think it even resulted in repressing my sexuality. I remember as a teenager saying that I can't imagine being a lesbian or into women (truth: I was terrified of being seen as not feminine, which in my head, I would be if I was not ultra straight).

Now I've spent the last two years exclusively dating women and it's such a wonderful thing that I'm sad I denied myself for so long. Especially since my weird toxic attitude kept me from even being close friends with women. I adore spending time with women now - socially or as colleagues.

Still working on getting better about it and part of me obviously wishes I knew better when I was younger - but it's also kind of thrilling and amazing to still feel like you're changing/improving once you're not in your 20's anymore. I actually hope/expect I'll be growing A LOT more in NEXT couple decades than I did in the LAST couple lol.

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