It used to be harder for me to exist. I felt out of place constantly and I worried about so many different (and ultimately unimportant) things. One of the beautiful parts of getting older has been releasing myself from caring about—or caring too much about—parts of my life that only matter if I let them. There are certain things that will always require my time and attention like my family, my friends and my own well-being. But there are plenty more things that don’t. And I’ve learned that focusing on them anyway was a waste of my time and caused me unnecessary agitation. Releasing them from my focus has given me less stress and made it easier for me to move through the world. It’s also made me realize that sometimes we don’t just need to think about what’s important, we also need to recognize what’s
“I don’t have to be one of them in order to be successful or enjoy my life.” Exactly! Unhealthy comparison does nothing good for me. I don’t like that I can’t help but be jealous of people like “that’s how I’m supposed to be” when I don’t even enjoy being like them
“Thinking the best is behind me is not an appealing way to live.” I’ll come back to this list whenever I feel like I’m worrying too much about things that doesn’t exact matter
This!! One of the best parts of getting older and being more comfortable in your own skin is realising what your actual values are, and what you don't give a flying fuck about!
I think the world is changing a little around this too, as I notice some younger people are way more confident in themselves than I was at 17, or 21, or 23! Writers like you who are honest and open about their struggles, the reality of being a person, and having a body play a huge part in this social change. Thank you for making the world a more truthful place! <3
Love this post. Can you share any insight into HOW you stopped judging yourself for the broken engagement? I know it is not my fault that my own engagement crumbled, but it still seems impossible not to blame myself. Thanks.
I agree with a lot of your list, especially topics like stomach problems, being a 'good' person, age and not being seen as 'cool'.
As I near another milestone in my life, my visual art or image hasn't grown as much, yet I've have grown in being kind with myself and only through myself can I get stuff done, work on responsibilities, help others, etc...
I feel this so much! I have loved how much the fear of other judging me or just self conciseness in general has melted away as I get older. Love your posts!
Now that I'm 79, the whole issue of how people react to my disability doesn't matter much to me anymore. I've moved beyond proving myself to others and wonder what a person really is all about instead of the titles he or she has displayed over the years on their name tags.
That preoccupation with titles, assumptions and stereotypes seems parochial to me during the second decade of the 21st Century. I've moved from what an individual does to who he or she is.
Jim Hasse, author, ABC, GCDF retired
"Opening Up" interactive newsletter
36 "Story-guided Discussions for Finding Peace with Age-related Limitations"
“I don’t have to be one of them in order to be successful or enjoy my life.” Exactly! Unhealthy comparison does nothing good for me. I don’t like that I can’t help but be jealous of people like “that’s how I’m supposed to be” when I don’t even enjoy being like them
“Thinking the best is behind me is not an appealing way to live.” I’ll come back to this list whenever I feel like I’m worrying too much about things that doesn’t exact matter
This!! One of the best parts of getting older and being more comfortable in your own skin is realising what your actual values are, and what you don't give a flying fuck about!
I think the world is changing a little around this too, as I notice some younger people are way more confident in themselves than I was at 17, or 21, or 23! Writers like you who are honest and open about their struggles, the reality of being a person, and having a body play a huge part in this social change. Thank you for making the world a more truthful place! <3
Love this post. Can you share any insight into HOW you stopped judging yourself for the broken engagement? I know it is not my fault that my own engagement crumbled, but it still seems impossible not to blame myself. Thanks.
I agree with a lot of your list, especially topics like stomach problems, being a 'good' person, age and not being seen as 'cool'.
As I near another milestone in my life, my visual art or image hasn't grown as much, yet I've have grown in being kind with myself and only through myself can I get stuff done, work on responsibilities, help others, etc...
I feel this so much! I have loved how much the fear of other judging me or just self conciseness in general has melted away as I get older. Love your posts!
Now that I'm 79, the whole issue of how people react to my disability doesn't matter much to me anymore. I've moved beyond proving myself to others and wonder what a person really is all about instead of the titles he or she has displayed over the years on their name tags.
That preoccupation with titles, assumptions and stereotypes seems parochial to me during the second decade of the 21st Century. I've moved from what an individual does to who he or she is.
Jim Hasse, author, ABC, GCDF retired
"Opening Up" interactive newsletter
36 "Story-guided Discussions for Finding Peace with Age-related Limitations"
Agreed. Life's too short to let unimportant matters rule one's life
Don’t care about list:
-trendy fashion
-being “the best” on my team at work
-how many people comment on my Facebook on my birthday (lol)
hot bitch IBS is a real thing. as a queer person, i firmly believe in talking about it bc trauma and also... i want my poops to be regular idgaf